Every now and then I find myself asking, "What's the point?" I struggle to find the right answers. I get stuck, and fires that were once ablaze go dim, turning into feelings of dark heaviness, like a fog stifling my being. The energy that can sometimes exist in me gone like a faint memory. All that's left is the smoke after the embers. A smoke that's suffocating, clouding my vision.
The only answer I can come up with is to create some semblance of meaning. This usually entails delving deeper into some of my idealism, or delving deeper into some of my passions. To get the smoke to clear, it's like I need a very hot and clean burning flame. It's a flame that burns me, causing me discomfort at times, but it seems a bit better than the alternative of suffocating.
The real world still looms, and I still find much of life quite meaningless. "Have beautiful hair and you'll be happy!" "Have six pack abs and you'll feel sexy and happy." "Win a million dollars in the sweepstakes and you'll be happy!" It's clear we all want to be happy, that's all I know. And some say happiness is the meaning of life. So perhaps I just haven't found the keys for happiness for me. Perhaps in finding that happiness I'll find the meaning I seek.
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