Wandering Ghosts

Sometimes we die, but our ghosts keep wandering the earth, making it difficult to live completely when we're reborn. We stay bound to the images of who we once were, stuck in a state of being partially asleep, trying to live a dream that no longer Is.

Our Perception and Responses

"On the night on which he was to attain enlightenment, the Buddha sat under a tree. While he was sitting there, he was attacked by the forces of Mara. The story goes that they shot swords and arrows at him, and that their weapons turned into flowers.

What does this story mean? My understanding of it is that what we habitually regard as obstacles are not really our enemies, but rather our friends. What we call obstacles are really the way the world and our entire experience teach us where we're stuck. What may appear to be an arrow or a sword we can actually experience as a flower. Whether we experience what happens to us as obstacle and enemy or as teacher and as friend depends entirely on our perception of reality. It depends on our relationship with ourselves."

From "When Things Fall Apart" by Pema Chodron

What is Right and What is Wrong?

Sometimes I don't know what's right and what's wrong.  I observe nature and see what we humans describe as wrong.

I've seen dogs kill kittens for what seems to be no reason, other than possibly territory or natural prey drive...  Male Grizzly bears and Hippos kill cubs and young ones for the opportunity to mate...  Chimps kill each other in territorial wars...  Animals kill each other for food...

I've watched ducks up close and personal...  Ducks will pick on one of their siblings if the sibling has something physically wrong with it...  What I saw was a duck blind in one eye being chased off and ostracized my its siblings...  I've seen male ducks invade a space occupied by a couple and rape the female duck...

A lot of instinctual behavior seems to be the root of a lot of violence and what we consider to be wrong.  So is there another standard for humans?  Are we somehow above all of this instinctual animal behavior?

And when we attempt to align ourselves with the side of "right", does that mean we're allowed to punish and treat others with violence?  And isn't that violence essentially the same thing, only gilded with different labels?

I'm unsure how to define what is right and what is wrong...

What Do You Wake Up For?

What do you wake up for? Now there's a question I can't answer.  I envy those who can answer such questions.  But honestly, I don't have a good answer for that.  I'm clueless.  What do I look forward to upon awakening each and every day?  It must be nice to have so much zest and enthusiasm for whatever those things are...

Sunrise and Sunset

Some days are long
Some nights are long
And I can never tell
What part of the day or night I shall awaken to
And when I shall go back to sleep

Overuse of the word "Toxic"

In my opinion the word "toxic" is thrown out too readily and easily.  People love to call others "toxic".  It's an easy way to avoid looking at oneself.  It creates a false sense of separateness, that we're somehow better than the next person.  It implies "that person is toxic, and I am not.  I am better than said person.  Those people must get away from me so they do not affect me."

If we see it so readily, the truth is we're probably seeing an aspect of ourselves we don't like.  If it seems to follow us around, there's a reason for that.  Our eyes are what's affected... as well as our hearts.

Dark submits to the presence of Light.

The Little Lost Singer

Lately I've been trying to reflect back on who I was or what I enjoyed doing as a child...  I vaguely remember family members telling me I used to sing "Little Red Corvette" (just those words) over and over again in our VW bus that had a broken radio at the time...  I also remember finding a tape recording of when I was much younger, and on the tape I was playing organ I believe (not actual notes or chords) while singing my own name...

It's weird to have no conscious memory of doing these things, but apparently it's something I enjoyed doing.  So perhaps I need to do a better job at honoring the little lost singer within, making an effort to get back in touch with that part of myself.

The Calm Ocean

The calm ocean can only remain calm for so long...  Right when we think we're in for a smooth ride...